I like you, clumsy and dull, having nothing and giving everything. ——He Jin Nian.
I shined bright from the day that I was born. I could easily solve problems that other children of the same age encountered.
I was never worried about my grades, but a life without trouble was boring after a long time.
When I met her, I used up all the luck in this one life.
And I didn’t have the luck to be with her.
From middle school to high school, from high school to university, I always felt that she was a person that I was grateful to and had no other thoughts. Even when she handed that love letter to Xu Ze Yan, I only felt a bit of loss.
This loss didn’t make me sad and didn’t hurt my heart.
It was just that feeling that you got when your best friend got another half and you were frozen by it.
But there were many people in my life that I quickly forgot about.
Until that day on the basketball court. When I greeted her and said a few words to her.
Her boyfriend came over and showed off his superiority which made people annoyed to look at.
But I didn’t say anything. I thought that I could walk away as gracefully as before.
But without knowing why, I suddenly cared……
Perhaps it was because she said to Xu Ze Yan: We’re not fighting, we’re going separate ways.
Maybe it was because she looked at me with the corner of her eyes.
In short, I suddenly felt restless.
I rarely felt this way, but once I did, I would do…..something special.
For example, I knew that she went to the library.
For example, I ran into her there.
Sitting next to her, I felt my indifference turn to nervousness.
I was so nervous that I said in a slightly unwilling voice: Single people have nothing to share.
Then she said something that completely stunned me. She said that she was single too.
That feeling was very wonderful, a feeling that couldn’t be described with any words.
Actually, what I looked forward to the most was the class reunion.
Because I knew that there would be people who would put my name together with hers.
But what I never thought was that Chen Ying Ying would suddenly appear.
But she seemed to be the key that allowed my heart to fill with determination.
I suggested that we roll dice.
The reason was very simple, I wanted to use the alcohol to say some things and do some things that I didn’t dare do before.
But I never would have thought that her alcohol tolerance was that good……
I suddenly felt small in front of her and she…..was that kind of dazzling.
The sound of beer bottles opening kept ringing out and the people around fell one by one.
She narrowed her eyes to seriously look at me which made my heart panic.
Finally I decided, I would act drunk.
Actually, it wasn’t completely acting. I had drank so much that my blood was boiling and my mind was particularly clear.
I could feel her bringing me into the taxi and I could smell the fragrance from her along with the scent of alcohol.
At that moment, I felt like I couldn't take it anymore.
There were things that could be left unsaid, but some things had to be done.
In the living room on the first floor, in that dim light, when I suddenly hugged her, I was probably more nervous than her.
What I wanted to know the most was……did she see through my heart?
Xu Ze Yan…..or…..me?