Two days later, I was dungeon diving with Masamuneigh in my hand. A pretty blonde-haired wizard was accompanying me. There was nobody else around.
"And that’s why I want you to be my external conscience circuit.”
"I was wondering why you suddenly invited me out to a dungeon, but it looks like things are getting weird again.” After a brief explanation, the blonde-haired beauty Yulia muttered with interest, her glasses gleaming.
Yulia was a childhood friend of mine, a part of the Magic Guild, and a freak magic researcher.
She's usually in her lab all day, but I forced her to come.
"Masamuneigh said that the owner registration can never be canceled; is that true?”
"I haven’t really looked into it so I can’t give a definite answer, but that’s likely true. There are some weapons and magic items that require owner registration, so… Huh, the Scapegoat Doll I gave you is one of them."
[It’s tied to your soul, so if you try to forcibly cancel it, you will die.]
"They say the only way to unregister it is to destroy it."
The words, "Okay, let's destroy it!” almost slipped from my tongue, but powerful weapons like holy swords and cursed demonic swords weren’t so easy to destroy.
The amount of money needed to break one such sword was like a mountain compared to the money I got yesterday from selling the loot from the boss I inadvertently oneshot.
And who wanted a broken holy sword? I could only sell it for some chump change at that point.
"I wouldn’t be able to get that kind of cash. D*mn, I’d have to save up for a while...... F*ck! I was gonna sell the holy sword and play around the rest of my life. It would’ve been awesome, feel me?”
[Let’s do a Dungeon Boss Marathon! You’ll be a millionaire in no time flat!]
"Are you stupid or an idiot? I only used you a little yesterday, and my muscles are strained, my *ss is in pain, and I think I dislocated something. No way in h*ll I’m doing something like that again!”
One of Masamuneigh’s effects was [Gain Holy Sword Skill], which raised the level of the wielding arm to that of a master swordsman.
I did a little testing yesterday, and I cut through a rock as smoothly as if it were butter. A little too excited, I went dungeon diving…
Ah, the joys of pulling muscles I didn’t even know I had and the bliss of discovering how flexible my joints could be… Is something that only some masochistic main character from some of those Eastern cultivation novels would say. After only a single battle, I felt as if I was dying from the pain.
Since another of Masamuneigh’s skills was Passive Regeneration, I was able to move soon enough. Elsewise, I would’ve been monster food by now.
“So why did you call me out here? I don’t really understand what you mean by ‘external conscience circuit.’”
“Ah, so basically I want you to make sure I don’t do any evil things.”
“...To put it simply, you want me to be in a party with you? Do I get anything out of this?”
“I still need to fully practice it, but once I’m able to use the skills, you can get money for your research after defeating monsters. And Masamuneigh is able to boost the XP amount, item drop rate, and skill learning rate by a f*ck ton, so I think this will be a big help to your future research.”
“And how are we splitting it? Don’t forget that I’m a researcher who can’t fight.”
“Since I forcefully pulled you over here, how about we split it 3:3? And the remaining 4 can go to the party funds that I’ll leave for you to manage.”
Yulia stopped to ponder, but I was confident that she wouldn’t reject me.
The fact that she asked questions instead of refusing me was proof that she never planned to abandon me from the start.
I’ve known her for a long time, and if there’s one thing that I could say about her, it’s that she’s much too good of a person.
I chose her as an external conscience circuit because I knew that she would absolutely never fall into depravity along with me.
She seems like a demanding woman, and she’s always holed up in her lab, so not many people know her.
I’m probably the only one who’s gotten anything from her. Like the Scapegoat Doll, which normally costs about a hundred grand to set up, was done for me after I cleaned her room three times.
“I’ll join you for a month, and if we still don’t get results by then, I’ll rethink this, okay?”
“Of course that’s okay! Sorry for pushing you. If I still can’t use the skills after a month, you can have this sword.”
[Wait, what did you just say!?]
“It feels like I’ll get cursed or something, so I’ll decline that.”
“Ain’t that right. I wonder if I can chuck it into a volcano.”
[I’m a holy sword! If you treat me like that, I’ll turn into a copy of you and run around the town naked, got that!]
“That’s actually not a bad idea. You should hurry up and find a volcano.”
[It’s not like it’ll woooork. I can just swim out of the lavaaaaa. And then I’ll distribute Yulia’s underwear to everyone in the toooooown.]
“Masamuneigh… You’ll be eating nothing but raw peppers starting today.”
“Wait Gyle, feed her ghost peppers instead.”
[“I’m sorry, it was just a sudden impulse. I won’t do any weird things, so please forgive me.]
…Three weeks later.
I was finally sorta able to use the Holy Sword Skill, easily raking in the cash at the lower levels of the dungeon.
I had graduated from being a small fry; my holy sword could cut through boulders as if they were butter.
As long as I didn’t strain anything, monsters were merely sticks of butter waiting to be cut.
Today, I’d start from the seventieth floor, with the goal of killing the eightieth floor boss.
It was the second time I’d been to this level. It was chock-full of large monsters with terrifying defense ability, but to me… to the holy sword, they were nothing but sitting ducks.
Only three of them would appear at one time, at most, so it was easy to fight while protecting Yulia.
And nothing unexpected happened. I smashed through golems and ogres and reached a huge door. Opening it, we reached the floor boss.
A minotaur, a bull-headed giant twice as tall as a man, was standing in front of me with a huge axe in his hand.
I was the only one who could fight it, so I left my backpack with Yulia and asked her to stand by in the corner of the boss room with her shield up.
When I fought it the day before yesterday, it attacked with a fair amount of speed, unlike other large demons.
Its fast-moving body was itself a weapon, and despite my strengthened body from the Holy Sword’s passive effects, I was still left in shambles when I took the minotaur’s attacks.
In the end, I had no choice but to use the Holy Sword Skill to its fullest and managed to defeat it, but the backlash caused my muscles to get pulled and stretched and torn every which way. It was the worst.
But that wasn’t going to happen this time!
—Even if I ran away, it would get worse, so I would end this in one blow!
I was going to close the distance as fast as I could to the Minotaur, before it knew what I was going to do!
The minotaur looked as if it wanted to intercept me. It raised its axe up high, gathering its strength—but that only made it even easier for me!
My sword down, close to the ground, I rushed towards the minotaur. And swoosh! The minotaur’s muscles bulged as it brought down its giant axe with all the strength it could muster.
I let out a primal battlecry, “Oraaaaaaaa!!”
Our battle intents brandished, the holy sword clashed with the bull’s axe. Gishi. A tiny sound reverberated.
I felt no resistance as my sword cut straight through the axe, leaving fragments fluttering in the air.
As the axe was split into two parts, the minotaur lost his balance—it was my chance!
Using one of the Holy Sword’s skills, Sword of Light, I brought up the sword and powerfully swung it down at the minotaur!
With a shout, the slash of light generated in the trajectory of the sword slashed the minotaur from shoulder to waist as if it was being sucked in!
A second of silence later, a huge gush of blood spurted out from the cut wound, disappearing in the air as black particles.
A second of nervousness later, the minotaur's body slowly fell onto its back in front of me as I watched, still battle ready, and black particles began to form from its body as well.
“Oh yeah baby! The minotaur’s dead!”
It was great to know that the Sword of Light could one shot it. The next fight against it would be much easier.
“I guess you can now cleanly cut something like the minotaur’s axe in half.”
[Hehe, it’s all thanks to me. You can praise me more, you know?]
“What are you on; it’s my power! Muahaha, with this power, I shall—argh!”
“Don’t go descending into darkness! Hey, since we beat up the floor boss, let’s just get the items it dropped and leave.”
“Okayyy… Oh d*mn, we got a rare drop! We’re in real luck today, huh.”
As I rubbed my bruised head and looked around, I saw that the minotaur had turned into several glowing items.
The color of the light would tell you how rare it is, with a rarity order of: blue-green-red-purple-yellow. The further to the right of that, the rarer it would be, and in this case there were three green ones and one purple one.
The purple drop items were also known as Super Rare, and one of these items is worth at least several million—the equivalent of an average family's annual income.
Excited, I picked up, and a purple light and it gradually formed a shape…
“Hah? Why is this super rare item a leather bag?”
When the light subsided, it turned into a common, sturdy-looking shoulder bag, like those often used by adventurers!
It was definitely a scam. Despite my disappointment, Masamuneigh sounded excited.
[That's a magic bag! It's a classic item that always pops up in stories! I knew it! Gyle is destined to be a hero!]
So, this was a magic bag? It was an extremely rare item that only a few nobles and big merchants had!
I looked at it sullenly and put my hand inside to try it out ...... I was shoulder-deep and couldn't touch the bottom! It was actually a magic bag!
[This will make adventures much easier, and when you’re dumping all your spoils at the receptionist’s counter, the big-boobed receptionist will go ‘Oh my god, that’s so big!’]
“Hah? What are you saying? We’re selling this.”
[Why!? Normal people wouldn’t sell this, you know. It’s a magic bag, a magic bag. It’s a super rare item that everyone wants!]
—No, that's why I'm selling it. Why doesn't she get that part?
“Yes, it's a super-rare item that everyone wants, and it will also fetch a h*ll of a price."
'Are you an idiot! If I miss this one, I don't know when I'll get it next! Do you really think there is an item more useful than this for dungeon diving!
"Currently, I'm making more than enough money just circling this level, and I can store the drop items in my backpack. ...... Yeah, I have no problem selling it."
'Please be more ambitious! Waaah~"
—Don't cry, it's depressing, no one is in trouble and you even get money, so be happy!
As I settled on that decision, Yulia chimed in.
“If you're going to sell it, Gyle, I want you to let me buy it."
“You want it?"
After I said it, I thought about it, but then I realized that for a magic freak like Yulia, such a super rare item is a research object!
And since they're not generally available to the public, you wouldn't normally be able to research them.
"I'm currently useless, but I can at least be a baggage handler with it, but... the money… maybe in a few years..."
“You can have it.”
I stopped her mid-sentence.
If it was for research, I'd take some, but if it was for adventure, I ain't taking any money.
“What? ...... No, I'll pay you for it."
“Then clean my room three times. That’s what you always say."
“That's ...... yeah, thanks."
So far, she’d help me with all my selfish requests, so something like this wasn’t a problem.
She wasn’t the selfish type in the first place, and I’d be less of a man if I couldn’t give her this much.
[Hmmm? What’s with the different treatment from when I asked! Is it because I’m not the female lead! So am I just some insect blocking your way!?]
"Shut up, I'll find you a good partner one of these days, you just have to put up with it for now...... like a living armor."
[Who’d date a living armor! There’s literally nothing inside!]
“There’s also nothing inside your brain, so it’s a perfect fit.”
[Fight me! I will run through the streets crying out, "Gyle has done terrible things to me!"]
I started rubbing a ghost pepper against the “h”oly “s”word.
[I'm sorry, I'm just kidding, so please stop pressing it against me.]
Yulia stopped us, “Gyle, don’t do anything stupid and let’s just go home. I want to settle our accounts before the guild gets too crowded."
“Okay. Tsk, you can continue living for now.”
[Thank you, Yulia. You can’t be my rightful owner, but I will let you be my person on the side.]
“Gyle, I'm going to get something spicier than a ghost pepper this time."
“Okay, I’ll feed it to Masamuneigh when you do,” I replied with a straight face.
The holy sword at my waist turned human and got down on her knees.
“It was a sudden impulse. A weak girl like me is dogeza’ing you, so you’ll forgive me. Right? If you want, I can lick your feet too.”
I laughed when I saw Yulia's face because of how sneaky she was, and we had a light conversation eye to eye, and she nodded with a smile on her face.
Quickly putting the rest of the drop items into my backpack and carrying it on my back, I grabbed Masamuneigh's arm and helped her to stand up.
“Masamuneigh, you really are vulnerable to food-related threats, even though you won't die if you don't eat.
[I don't have a choice! I've been in the dungeon alone for a hundred years! You can say that because you don’t know how good food tastes!]
"If you're going to be like that, don't say something stupid from the start… Come on, let's go, we have to get there before it gets crowded, else we can't get into the good restaurants."
[Good restaurant… we won’t be going to a cheap place today!?]
Her eyes widened at my words, and she hung on to my arm.
I wondered how much she liked food.
“A decent restaurant, a decent restaurant. In the first place, I don’t even have any formal clothes for an expensive restaurant.”
[Then let's buy some clothes, a Dungeon Boss Marathon is just a short walk away, hurry up!]
“Don’t say stupid things… Anyways, we’ll be going to a decent restaurant, so let’s meet up later after you get a change of clothes, Yulia.”
“Yes, yes. You too, Gyle, go clean yourself up. If you’re too dirty, they’ll kick you out of the place.”
[I'll take care of it! I'll cast a cleansing spell on you until I run out of mana!]
“How dirty do you think I am!?”